Fareham Counselling Centre

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Help for Sexual Difficulties using Counselling in Fareham


Sexual difficulties are appearing to be more commonplace, as people are beginning to feel more comfortable discussing the subject. Anyone can be affected by sexual issues, they can be traced back to a physical problem or a sudden change in one’s life circumstances, many sexual difficulties can be understood with communication.

4 main reasons to have sex

  • Physical reasons: Pleasure, stress relief, sexual curiosity, or attraction to a person.
  • Goal-based reasons: To have a baby, social status, or revenge.
  • Emotional reasons: Love and commitment.
  • Insecurity reasons: self-esteem, keep a partner from seeking sex elsewhere, or a sense of duty or pressure.

The difference between the sexes

Men have sex because they like how it feels. Women are generally more interested in the emotional connection that sex offers.

There are many different reasons why someone may develop sexual problems, but often, it tends to be due to a combination of 4 main areas, physical, emotional, psychological and situational factors.

  • Physical factors – Disabilities and illnesses such as diabetes, heart disease, alcoholism and drug abuse can contribute to sexual dysfunction. Individuals who have experienced surgery, pregnancy, and the menopause.
  • Psychological – Anxiety, depression and other mental health issues can have a negative effect on sexual responses.
  • Emotional – Grief, betrayal, unhappiness, and low self-esteem can impact on how people feel sexually.
  • Situational –A change in circumstances or living in a stressful situation can contribute to the development of sex problems.
Female sex problems 

Pain during sex

Also known as dyspareunia, pain during sex can be very common, particularly in women who have gone through or are going through the menopause. It can also be due to poor lubrication during sexual intimacy which may be psychologically linked.

Orgasmic Disorder

Although many women do not need to have an orgasm to enjoy sex, being unable to orgasm may cause problems for their partners.

Why women can’t orgasm during any form of sexual stimulation, may vary, from medical reasons to deep-rooted psychological issues that may be affecting their inability to ‘let go’.

Loss of desire 

It can be common for a woman to experience a lack of sex drive at times in her life, particularly during pregnancy and menopause, but some women may be affected more regularly. There are several psychological and physical factors that can cause this, including diabetes, relationship problems, depression, tiredness, traumatic sexual experiences and drug and alcohol abuse.

Relationship Therapy & Hypnotherapy in Fareham
Male sex problems 

Premature ejaculation.

Regularly ejaculating before or within one minute of penetration is regarded as premature.

Delayed ejaculation

A delay in achieving ejaculation, or where a man is completely unable to ejaculate during sexual activity.

Loss of Desire

Like women men can also lose desire. Alcohol or drugs can impact the ability to perform, as can tiredness, relationship problems, and trauma.

Other explanations

There are lots of reasons why you or your partner might be feeling less interested in sex:

Feeling less connected. 

Maybe you haven’t spent as much time together lately. Perhaps something has happened in your relationship that’s caused conflict, such a big argument or an affair.

Too busy to make time for sex.

You may be so busy with work, looking after children or dealing with other pressures that you don’t have time to spend on your relationship.

You don’t feel connected to your sexual self.

Maybe there are things about your body or how you look that you don’t like, and this makes it difficult for you to see yourself in a positive, sexual way.

You’ve had negative experiences with sex. 

You may have been criticised by a partner in the past or grew up believing that sex is negative in some way.

You struggle with performance anxiety. 

Meaning the thought of having sex makes you worried and stressed.

Mental or physical health issues may be making things difficult. 

You may have insecurities about a physical condition, or your interest in sex may be unsettled by a mental illness.

Anxieties surrounding sex can also come from different expectations about how much sex you think you should be having.

It’s very common for one partner to have a lower or higher libido than the other. Many people don’t experience spontaneous sexual desire and find this only usually happens after their partner makes an advance.

Both these things can leave one of you feeling like the other isn’t attracted to them, while the other feels there’s nothing wrong.

Worrying about your sex life can also be triggered by feeling like you’re not having as much sex as others, thinking that everyone else is ‘at it’ much more than you. In truth, the ‘right’ amount is however much sex you have that works for you and your partner.

Relationship Counselling Therapy

Relationship Counselling Therapy is effective for helping couples to explore their physical communication and their understanding of what sex means to them. Long-term relationships can get stale. Discussing trying something new maybe a difficult conversation to have. Expressing their needs, wants and desires in a “safe” environment with a professional will allow each person time to speak and be heard by their partner. People can lose the ability to communicate with each other, this can be very disruptive to a sexual relationship and can then lead to frustration and disappointment.

Whatever the reason is behind your sexual difficulties we can help you.  Seeking help from one of our friendly, professional counsellors will help you to resolve your issues and get you back on track to a happier more satisfying sex life.

We offer sessions to individuals and to couples so whether you wish to come on your own or with a partner we can help you.  Please call us today on 0800 970 4776 and make an appointment to get the help you need.t the help you need LET US HELP YOU TODAY

Counselling at the Fareham Counselling Centre can assist you in managing your emotions at this difficult time, and can help you get your life back on track, no matter how much pain you are feeling at this time and whatever difficulties you are facing.

Call us now on 07946 641270, or complete our online form to book an appointment with one of our Counsellors in our Fareham Practice TODAY!

 

 

 

 

 

 

LET US HELP YOU TODAY

Counselling at the Fareham Counselling Centre, can assist you in managing your emotions at this difficult time, and can help you get your life back on track, no matter how much pain you are feeling at this time and whatever difficulties you are facing.

Call us now on 07946 641270, or complete our online form to book an appointment with one of our Counsellors in our Fareham Practice TODAY!

Fareham Counselling Centre

The Regus Centre
Forum 3, Solent Business Park
Whiteley,
Fareham,
Hampshire
PO15 7FH